Kaibaman and Kuriboh
by Jonouchi Katsuya
Summary: Due to unfortunate circumstances Seto Kaiba has invited Jaden Yuki into his mansion. By day, Seto Kaiba is just an extraordinary businessman, by night, he is the white knight known as Kaibaman!
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: This story was written for Cheeky-Eyes for Secret Santa. Her love of GX made me think of this fic. I really hope everyone likes what I have written, but even if you don't, I welcome your review.**

In a dimly lit room a young boy in his mid-teens sat on a burgundy couch. His brown eyes focused on his fingers. In front of him, a larger mahogany desk; a tall and intimidating man seated behind it.

The room was quiet and still. Kaiba leaned forward to rest his lips on his hands folded for a brief moment then leaned on one hand. His brain ticking a million miles a minute. Kaiba's eyes fixed on the boy. Jaden's body shifted and before the soles of Jaden's shoes left the floor Kaiba snapped, "Don't put your shoes on my sofa."

"Sorry Bro," Jaden mumbled.

"Just take your shoes off," Kaiba turned to his laptop. Click. Click. Click. Then his fingers went a blur:click-click-clicky-click.

Jaden layed back and flipped his shoes off his feet.

Out of the corner of his eye, Kaiba could see that Jaden's socks were less than clean. Jaden's big toe could be seen fully protruding from one of his socks. The bottoms were brown. The hairs on the back of Kaiba's neck stood straight up. Kaiba thought of covering his nose as a wave of stink-foot headed towards his sensitive nose.

"Jaden," Kaiba's lips pursed, and with a sigh he continued "put your shoes back on."

"Chillax man, no need to be stern." Jaden slipped his shoes back on. "You happy?"

Kaiba logged off his laptop and packed it away. Putting his bag over his shoulder, he made his way to the door. Kaiba stood there for a moment before telling Jaden, "You coming or do I have to come back a month later and find you ate the couch?"

"Yeah man, I'm coming." Jaden looked to either side of himself to make sure he wasn't leaving anything behind before grabbing his bags and following Kaiba out the door.

On the way home, Kaiba started explaining his expectations, his rules, his blah blah blahs. Jaden couldn't have cared less. He stared longingly out the window, wishing he was at his own home, in his own bed, with his mom and his dad. But his dad was gone... and his mom, she might as well have been.

"Flush the toilet after every use; I can afford it. Ask before you use anything that isn't yours or in your room. This does not mean you can bring something from outside your room to inside so you can use it-"

"Gee, I get it, pops!" Jaden groaned.

_This is going to be a long trip..._ Kaiba thought.

When they arrived at the Kaiba mansion, Kaiba was greeted by Roland and Mokuba. Kaiba gave them an acknowledging nod and gently guided Jaden forward.  
Jaden had never seen the Kaiba mansion in person before. It was smaller than he expected. You would think a billionaire would spruce it up with a third and fourth floor and although the front yard looked nice from the air, it was rather unimpressive upfront. There were no flowers. Jaden thought about how his mom would have planted a rose bush or two at the very least.

"Hey." Jaden pointed two gun fingers at them and clicked his molars.

Mokuba was not amused. He stood there, his arms folded, with a sour look on his face.

Roland inwardly chuckled at Jaden's high spirits considering the circumstances.

"So, do you want me to show you to your room?- If that's alright with you, Mr. Kaiba."

Kaiba gave him a nod.  
Jaden followed Roland inside. They went up the long winding staircase, and on the third door on the left, there was a sign that read:_ Jaden's room._ Roland twisted the gold knob to reveal Jaden's new room. Jaden couldn't believe his eyes. It was perfect. Much better than the dorm room he had been staying in - that was certain.

"Neat digs."

_Duel monsters theme. Awesome._ The Elemental Hero Neos on his comforter. Jaden touched the Winged Kuriboh wall scroll. On the nightstand, although it seemed so out of place, there was a Time Wizard Alarm clock._ Maybe Kaiba likes the Time Wizard_, Jaden thought. _Kind of an older card though. How old school._ Jaden sat on the bed, shifting his weight and bouncing. The bed was soft and the comforter had the perfect texture that made you feel all cozy, mom...

Roland knocked on the door lightly before walking in. "I have your bags." He showed them to Jaden, then gently set them on the floor. "Mr. Kaiba asks that you put your clothing away in the closet and meet him downstairs for further instructions."

Jaden rolled his eyes._ More rules? What is he going to tell me this time? Chew before I swallow?_ "Fine, be right down."  
Roland tipped his head toward Jaden, then left his room.

Jaden opened up the closet which had two large wooden doors that connected in the middle. The first thing Jaden noticed was its large size. It was the size of Jaden's old bedroom. There were many compartments to keep things organized, and it had a rack for hanging clothes like most closets. On the rack, Jaden found something quite strange - a Blue eyes White Dragon pajama set. They looked really comfortable. Jaden wasn't too sold on the Blue Eyes White Dragon, though. Sure, it was a cool card that was super rare, but... he preferred his own cards. "Hm... there's a note here," Jaden said to himself.

_"For those especially cold nights-_ Seto Kaiba."

Jaden's eyes welled up with tears and started to sniffle. Maybe he ain't so bad.

Jaden didn't have many clothes - a few shirts and pairs of pants, as well as his school uniform. He could have quickly put away his stuff and then packed it back up again if things didn't work out. Maybe Kaiba wouldn't want him to stay. Maybe he wouldn't want to stay with Kaiba. He does seem to be a bit of a rule monkey, Jaden thought. Maybe his mom would recover from the tragedy after being treated by as many doctors as she had, although, they had told him it wasn't likely. 'They' being adults who knew stuff but didn't want to tell him what had really gone down while he was at school. All he knew was that dad had died in a plane crash, and mom had gone nutzoid.

Downstairs, Mokuba, Seto Kaiba, and Roland were seated at the dinner table waiting for Jaden. It sent a 'creeper chill' down Jaden's spine. Jaden wondered what had made the Addams family so rich. Maybe it was simply made up of rich people who thought sitting at one end of a long dining table with twenty other empty chairs was the normal thing to do when introducing someone new to their home. _What's next?_ Jaden thought. _Eating off empty plates and drinking from empty glasses? Jaden gulped at the thought of vampires._

"Although Mokuba and I hardly seem to have time to do these things on a regular basis, we do try to have dinner at around 7 P.M..." Kaiba trailed off.  
"It'll probably be the only time of the day you'll see me," Mokuba added in a tainted tone. His hands started to curl into fists.

"I would really like to be here for you. But if I am not, you can always count on Roland. He will be home the entire break to spend time with you," Kaiba looked at Roland. Roland nodded.

"I don't need a babysitter. I can watch myself," Jaden said.

Mokuba huffed. "You aren't going to take that kind of talk, are you?"

Kaiba remained silent.

"Oh, so just because his dad died and his mom went crazy, you're going to coddle him?" Mokuba stood up from the table. "What about whe-"

"We will talk later, Mokuba. Jaden is a guest in our home, and I suggest you treat him with a minimal amount of respect."

Mokuba shook his head. _We had it so much worse._..He couldn't believe this. He leaned over the table to better make eye contact with Jaden. "Learn your manners. Respect your elders." He stood upright and took a few steps back from the dinner table. "I'm going to work," he scoffed. Mokuba stormed out of the Kaiba mansion.

Kaiba looked very uncomfortable with the events that had just unfolded. Mokuba bringing out dirty laundry in front of everyone when they were trying to have a nice, calm evening was disheartening to say the least. But he composed himself with a simple sigh and then cracked a slight smile. "Are you hungry?"  
"Heck yeah!" Jaden exclaimed. After a long trip, food was just what he needed.

After a wonderful dinner that involved Jaden eating more than his fair share, Kaiba pointed to a door in the living room. "The only rooms you are not allowed to enter are that room, Mokuba's room, and my own room. Any other room is open for your meanderings. Clear?" Kaiba asked.

"Crystal." Jaden smiled, looking around the living room. "Hey, can I watch TV?"

"Go for it," Kaiba said. "We also have some game systems you can hook up," he added, pointing to a glass case that contained a Wii, Xbox 360, and PS3. "And we also have some of my own game systems as well." Kaiba winked.

"Wow, cool!" Jaden was so excited. Goodbye, shitty Gameboy Advance SP! Hello better game systems! And the best of all, virtual-reality gaming!  
Later that night, Jaden became bored of playing video games and decided to channel surf instead. He stopped on the news channel. _Some kooky guy in a costume this should be interesting. _

"BREAKING NEWS: A vigilante is taking the city by storm, saving people from beatings, helping old ladies a crossed the street, and gives toys to orphans. He has also been stopping lot of gang violence. His name: Kaibaman. And we love him folks. And we love him."

"Wow, that guy is so cool. I wish I were a super hero. But why would a super hero would be breaking news?... I dunno."

"Wanted: Madam Butterfly."

Uninterested in watching any more boring news, Jaden switched off the TV. He was going to explore.


	2. Chapter 2

_Kaiba sure has a creepy house,_ Jaden thought. Everything was so clean for a house so large. No cobwebs or dust, but there was a creepy painting of Seto Kaiba in the hallway. It's placement seemed strange to Jaden. He obviously wanted to look at it, but not have anyone else just down for the casual visit to look at it. _If you don't wanna have anyone lookin' at your creepy painting, why have it painted in the first place._ Maybe it was an after thought, one of those things where at first it seemed cool, but later, not so much.

Jaden suddenly got a fantastic idea to entertain himself. While running, Jaden started opening up every door but Mokuba's and Kaiba's room doors which were convienently marked for him. None of the doors had that satifying creak that Jaden was looking for. _What's the deal with having a big creepy mansion, if you aren't going to have mandatory squeaks in your door?_

Bored, Jaden stopped thinking for a while and started wondering around the mansion, not taking care to where he put his feet. He kind of looked like a zombie, moving in an 's' shape, letting his arms flop about in any direction until he reached the stairs again. The rails just looked so perfect, so polished. Jaden looked around to see if Roland was anywhere in sight; he had always wanted to try this, but just never had the perfect stair rail to do it on.

Jaden put his left leg over the railing, his hand keeping a firm grip he lifted himself so he could straddle the railing. "Ah-fffff" _fuck... _He wasn't careful enough. He pinched one of his balls between his leg and the railing and he fell off writhing in pain. "Shit..." _bad idea. _And at the bottom of the steps, Seto Kaiba had seen the entire thing and was trying to hold back a laugh with one finger on his lips.

"What might you be trying to do on my railing?"

"Nothin' man, nothin'." Jaden got up.

"'Nothing' is right. Those would be expensive to replace."Kaiba motioned for Jaden to come to him. Jaden tried not to look at Kaiba as he sauntered down the stairs. He knew he was it trouble. Kaiba put one hand on his shoulder and leaned down to whipser in his ear, "I'll teach you how to do it right next time," and walked off.

He didn't get yelled at Jaden was stunned. So stunned, he tried to follow him. But Kaiba had disappeared. Jaden quickly found himself in the living room were he had begun his journey round the Kaiba mansion. _Hm, where could he be? _He looked around for anything out of place, the door. The unexplained forbidden zone. The door was cracked open ever so slightly. Like someone tried to get down there quick for something.

Jaden's uneasy hand reached out to the forbidden door. He let his hand sit on the doorknob feeling for any vibrations. Roland... and he was upstairs doing something but like Jaden would know what. He slowly pulled the door open. He was relieved that the house was so well kept that the door didn't creak, even though, it would have made the house more normal if one damn door did.

On the balls of his feet, Jaden tiptoed down the stairs to spy on Kaiba. _Just what is he hiding?_ thought Jaden. He could hear the sound of banging and Kaiba's moaning. Jaden bit his lip to contain his immature snickering. It sounded so far away though. _Were there multiple rooms down here? Is this his home office? Hope not..._

When he reached the bottom of the stairs, his eyes widened in awe at a very large computer monitor with a control station. Jaden forgot he was sneaking and let out a "Whoah..." _This screen has to be a bajillion feet tall or something and a kazillion feet wid_e, Jaden thought. Stepping closer to the mega computer, he looked at all the keys. So many. Had it's red buttons, its random handle switch that you wonder what it does, and a female voice that could rival Ziggy any day.

Kaibaman HQ. That is what it read on the screen.

Suddenly, the banging stopped. Jaden looked around but saw nothing so he shrugged it off.

Jaden took a few steps diagonally. Standing amazed and in awe at what he was seeing.

Under his breath Jaden joked, "Well, Kaiba sure knows how to make a pad sweet when he wants too."

Still tip toeing around he didn't see a toolbox sitting on the ground. Bumping into it Jaden yelped and stopped dead in his tracks to look at where he had stumbled on.

Disgruntled, Kaiba quickly turned around to see Jaden mesmerized by everything around him. Furrowing his brows Kaiba felt a headache quickly coming on but sighed and said to Jaden.

"What do you think you are doing down here?" It was Kaiba alright. He was wearing the Kaibaman outfit without the helmet. _Awesome._

"So, dude, you're Kaibaman?"

Kaiba gave him a death stare. It didn't phase Jaden one bit.

Jaden smirked and blurted, "Your secret identity sucks man."

Filled with rage, Kaiba picked Jaden up by the neck. "Take it back." Kaiba demanded. Jaden gasped for air, trying to free himself. He was unable to say anything because Kaiba's grip was so if a magic wand was waved in Jaden's favor, Kaiba's snarl softened; he let the boy go, realizing he had fallen into old habits.

"Hm." Kaiba looked at his hand before closing it into a fist._ I shouldn't have done that..._ he thought.

"So just a guess here," Jaden put one hand on his hip, "I am not supposed to tell anyone, am I?"

"Damn well better keep your loud mouth shut or you may not wake up the next day," Kaiba huffed. "You are lucky I didn't just kill you now where you're standing." Kaiba turned away to stop himself from expressing more anger toward the boy.

Jaden smirked, a wonderful idea coming to his head. "What if I want a piece of the action? I want to be a super hero. Maybe I can-"

Kaiba turned to look back at Jaden. "I work alone. Now, if you would be so kind," Kaiba pointed in the direction of the stairs.

Jaden clenched his teeth and stiffly started to walk up the stairs. He stopped midway."Last thing, I promise." Jaden could feel Kaiba's anger burning a hole in his back. "Why do you fight crime?"

"I lost someone close to me to it." Kaiba said blankly. _Not really..._

Jaden had a sad smile come across his face. "I understand." And with that, Jaden climbed the rest of the stairs and left the Kaiba Kave.

Kaiba took a few steps and fell backwards into his chair. Tears welled up behind his eyelids, but they would not fall. He tried to get rid of the blur they created with his hand, but the haze just kept coming back. The memories had already come to the forefront of his mind.

.

One dark night, Kaiba was driving home from his office at Kaiba Corporation. The day had been rather uneventful; there were just some minor annoyances, nothing he couldn't handle.

The radio station he was listening to started playing a squeaky pop song. He groaned and switched it off rather than just changing the station like any sensible person. A red light appeared before him. He stopped. The red light always hurt his eyes, he squinted then looked away. He looked in his glove box to find suitable music. Nothing that interested him at the moment.

The road was eirily quiet. It felt as if the whole city just shut down. Maybe it was a holiday. Kaiba wouldn't know; the days just seemed to be melting into each other as of late. Work, sleep, work, sleep, Mokuba, work, work, sleep. Days into nights nights into days. Kaiba was just going through the preverbal motions. Kaiba looked back up at the light, one eye closed the other squinted. _Damn light._ If there wasn't a camera at every traffic stop, he would have just ran the damn thing. Nobody was coming.

His keen hearing told him to look to the right. A bunch of guys were beating up on a blond. It was Joey. He would know that blond anywhere. _Idiot_, Kaiba rolled his eyes, but thought briefly about going over to help him out. He decided against it as the light turned green and it would be against his 'code'.

He started to drive, but something in the pit of his stomach told him to stop. He could hear Joey screaming in agony. He pulled over and called the police and told them about what he had witnessed. Kaiba thought of it as charity._ Help an idiot day. That must be the holiday in question_. The police said they would be there as fast as possible. They said they would- but they weren't.

Joey was dead by the time the police arrived. Battered body, broken bones, missing teeth, face swelled up. Kaiba stood over his body as it lay motionless under fluorescent light on a metal platter for the dead. Unrecognizable from his cheerful self.

"I'm afraid I need to ask you to leave since you are not family" said the nurse.

"How much to stay?" Kaiba looked up at her red rimming his eyes. No sleep last night. Brain wouldn't let him sleep. Something was wrong. This morning's paper said there was a John Doe in need of identification. _Not him. That idiot is better than that._ But Joey was not better than that. He couldn't cheat death. His luck ran out when Kaiba ran out on him.

"Sir, I will not be bribed," the nurse said sternly.

While the nurse was flapping her lips further about policy and such, Kaiba was writing a check. The nurse placed her hands on her hips and huffed. Kaiba tore out the check and handed it to the nurse. _Stale air. _

"I am his cousin," Kaiba emphasized as the nurse nervously took the check in hand.

The nurse cleared her throat looking at the large sum of money written on the check. She tilted her head and smiled, "Yeah, yeah, his cousin." Before leaving she curtsied and left Kaiba alone with Joey.

Kaiba pulled up a stool but did not fully seat himself. Just sort of brought it up to lean on. He folded his arms and looked on at Joey.

"I'm sorry..." A tear splashed on the tile floor below.


	3. Chapter 3

"Time for some action!" Kaiba suited up quickly and hopped in to his Kaibamobile. Kaiba switched it into stealth mode allowing him to speed down roadways without police detection. Or rather, anyone's detection.

Driving super fast always made him feel so alive, so free. In this moment one might even say he felt bliss.

Kaiba flipped the radio on tuning into,... more pop music. Kaibaman, forgetting himself for a brief moment started to bounce his body, tap the steering wheel, and move his head to the beat. One might refer to these series of movements as dancing. But just as quickly as the dance party started the _Money Money Money _song that had gotten him into the groove, subsequently ended. Kaibaman regained his composure and turned the dials to hear the police radio.

Seemed like a quiet night but just as Kaibaman suspected, evil never sleeps. 9pm a woman gets her purse stolen by 'some dude'. Kaibaman stops him with a nice punch to the teeth. The nice lady thanked him upon him upon returning her stolen purse. 10pm two armed against a weaponless one, knife fight stopped. They were all disarmed and Kaibaman got them to work out their differences by suggesting a duel monsters battle instead. It was fair. 11pm Nothing.

Okay, so it was kind of a quiet night. No matter, Kaibaman did get to help a few people in trouble and get some of his pent up energy out.

Kaibaman decided to go around downtown one more time before turning in. Down an alley he was thanking the heavens above to see a scuffle. He turned stealth mode off before exiting the vehicle. _Wonder Woman would be proud._ Cautiously, he peered down the alley to see another person in a costume. _Looks like I have inspired someone to act stupidly._ Looked to be only a kid.

The kid was holding his own but it was way passed his bedtime. Just as Kaibaman turned the corner he heard a small explosion. His organs felt like they were floating for a second but were quickly quelled when he saw the suspected crook retreat and the kid was safe. The only thing that scares Kaibaman is being too late to save the innocent.

Kaibaman pulled out a flashlight to get a better look at the kid. The costume was poorly constructed. So much so, that he had a good idea as to who it could be.

He was wearing a beanie pulled over his face with holes for the eyes and mouth, his brown hair sticking out the top, red long underwear, angel wings, green gloves, and the dead give away? Slifer Red shoes. _How could he be so stupid?_

Kaibaman grabbed the kid's arm and held it firmly in one of his his large hands and with the other he took off the beanie. "Jaden," Kaibaman gritted between his teeth.

Jaden smiled that cheese smile of his and said, "Yo, bro, you know it is impolite to rip off a hero's mask like that."

Kaibaman jerked Jaden's arm and started to pull him to the Kaibamobile.

"Bro, we goin' someplace? Better be off the chain if ya catch my drift." Jaden pulled his arm free and walked willingly to the Kaibamobile's passenger seat. "This shiz is tight!"

"We're going home, Jaden."

"No way man. Did you see how awesome I was out there? Well maybe ya missed it but I was da bo-"

"You almost got yourself killed by being an idiot is what I saw. As long as you live under my roof you are never to do this again. Understand?" Kaibaman started the car.

Jaden pulled out a pack of gum. He opened up the round casing and pulled out the rolled up gum and proceeded to shove the entire thing in his mouth. Smack, chewy, smack. Jaden chewed louder than the radio. He blew a bubble. It popped and some of the gum was on his nose and cheeks. Jaden first tried to use his tongue to sweep the gum back into his mouth. When that tactic failed, he used his index finger to loop the gum around, chomping and pulling the gum simultaneously.

Kaiba briefly leered at him to show his disapproval.

"Want some?" Jaden held out a stick of gum.

"What kind?" Kaiba couldn't believe he was even curious as he isn't even a 'gum person'.

"Big Red," Jaden said.

"Not a fan," Kaiba said blankly.

"Why not? Cause it's red?"

Kaiba awarded the remark with a chuckle.

"What about 'Blue Spearmint'? Fan of that? Got some," Jaden pulled out a pack of gum with blue shiny packaging.

Kaibaman gave a smirk. "Sure." Unremittingly, this kid even made Kaiba feel a little on the sunny  
side.

Jaden laughed then had to wipe his cheek with his sleeve because some siliva dripped out. Jaden handed Kaiba the pack of gum.

Kaibaman took a stick directly out of the package and slipped off wrapping with ease.

Jaden suddenly started squinting his eyes and leaning forward. "Hey, isn't that?" he pointed at an apartment building off to the side. A woman with blonde hair and a purple cape was scaling down the side. Nobody was even trying to stop her.

Kaibaman imediately jumped out of his car and went after her leaving Jaden to his own devices.

Just as Kaibaman reached Madam Butterfly, she dismounted from the side of the wall. When she saw him, she scoffed and tried to go the opposite direction with her back of goodies. But Kaibaman is swift and kept blocking her from moving farther along with the stuff. In a huff, she handed him the stuff. He just dropped it. She pouted at him.

"Oh get off it. Stop being a goodie two-shoes," she said.

"You know damn good and well tha-"

"Than stop with the act. You know you want to join the dark side," she fluttered her eyelashes from behind the purple butterfly mask. She put her finger on her lips to think and said, "Come on baby, let's go on a walk." Her almost barbie like hands looked perfect when they interlocked with Kaibaman's.

"Why can't you just be good?" Kaiba asked her, "Or, completely evil."

"'Cause I am always bad, and nobody is completely evil." She turn gracefully to face Kaiba. The streets were so quiet this late at night. "You know that." Kaiba looked away from Madam Butterfly. But, her hands redirected his face to face her's. "Aw, sweety, you don't still love me do you?"

"No," Kaiba said almost too abruptly.

"Good, then this won't hurt a bit." Madam Butterfly slid one finger down her own cheek.

Kaiba could feel the presence of someone behind him, it was the Mothmen. Madam Butterfly's evil minions.

Kaiba back kicked then spun around to see more mothmen come out of the woodwork. Kaiba smirked. _Game on. _The Mothmen started to swarm all around him.

Meanwhile back in the Kaibamobile, Jaden was watching Kaiba fight. He couldn't help but want a slice of the action. Then he noticed that the keys were still in the ignition. _Sweet. And the mask, so convenient . _Jaden didn't know how to drive but, he shrugged his shoulders and he was quickly over the first time jitters. He turned that key and switched those gears into drive. He drove right at some of the mothmen, hit the break before hitting the wall of the apartment they were next to.

Kaiba tried not to throw a fit then and there. _You can repair all damages, don't worry,_ he told himself. Jaden quickly hopped out and into action. Jaden threw a tribble and it exploded causing one of the mothmen to recieve a burn and some scratches. "Wha-What was that thing? And who are you?" the mothman's mouth gaping open from astonishment.

"That my friend was an exploding tribble. And I, I'm-" Jaden had to think for a second. "I'm The Winged Kuriboh!"

"The winged?-" Jaden then kicked the guy in the nuts and the guy limped off.

When Jaden turned around there was a bunch of knocked out mothmen. Jaden gave Kaibaman his big signature grin when he saw the scowl that was on his face.

"Wait, where is Madam Butterfly?" Jaden asked.

"Fuck!" Kaiba scuffed his shoe. He could see in the distance that she had taken the goods and ran while they were fighting her ass monkeys.

Jaden gave Kaiba a hopeless look.

"Don't worry Jaden. I will catch up with her later. You ok?" Kaiba asked.

"Yeah," Jaden panted out.

"Good, cause you're grounded."

"Aw man. Come on bro, we hommies!" Jaden whined.

Kaiba pointed toward the car then walked ahead of Jaden to open the door.

Jaden gave Kaiba a pouty face. Kaiba gave him a sweep on in motion with his entire arm following threw on the motion. Jaden got in and slammed the car door as hard as he could. When Kaiba got around to the other side and tilted awkwardly to seat himself he took a bit of time to look at Jaden and laugh at him inwardly.

"What?" Jaden hissed.

"Now you're in more trouble. Just keep pushing." Kaiba was enjoying this. A grin plastered on his face. It looked kinda silly on him.

"If you sa-"

"Cruising for a bruising," Kaiba talked over. "Just letting you know. Everything you say can and will be used against you in the unfair court of Kaiba."

Jaden folded his arms and Kaiba put the pedal to the metal to get them home quick.


	4. Chapter 4

Jaden dealt with the grounding pretty well. All it meant was no going outside. Kaiba wasn't so good at grounding kids. He wanted to say no games but, he quickly caved after a few hours of being home. He wanted to play video games with someone and Mokuba was off being anti-social. And taking away toys and other gadgets? Once again, Kaiba just felt too bad to take stuff away from a kid, even if he was a tad disobedient, who already lost so much.

Something about Jaden being around made Kaiba feel all warm and fuzzy. Maybe it was the connection they shared when he was just a small tike entering his art contest. Even if Kaiba did want to be a hard ass, after all that he did to Joey, he swore to himself that he would never treat another human being like that ever again.

After only 3 days, Kaiba told him he can play in the yard. Jaden looked at him funny. "Dude. Being grounded from outside...that's the best punishment you got? You need to work on your skillz," he laughed and gave a victory sign.

"Go before I pummel you," Kaiba said, almost laughing too, trying to keep his serious, gruff voice at the same time. Jaden's laugh was contagious.

"Smell ya later, bro!" Jaden hopped over the side of the couch and ran outside.

"I'm not your bro, buddy." Kaiba muttered to himself.

Outside, it was so hot, for most others it would have been hard to enjoy being outside. But positivity was Jaden's middle name and he found some joy in it. Air that wasn't filled with Kaiba's ego was nice to breathe in. Jaden decided to take a seat in the grass and chill for a while. He thought of his friends from school as he was picking at the perfect grass. Kind of strange that he couldn't wait to go back already. _No moss.._. Jaden thought.

His abstract thinking was interrupted by a grown woman with long blonde hair hitting the wrought iron gates with a stick. A sudden blush went a crossed his face. Her stiletto heels clicked, her legs long and bare. Shorts, a floral blouse that seemed to float just right, long curly blonde hair, nobody could resist her. Even now that she was practically a cougar. But then again, she was always robbing the cradle.

She stopped where the gate opened. Jaden's eyes loyally followed her every move. She moved her finger up and down one of the bars before asking "Is Kaiba home?"

"Yeah, but I think he's breas-busy. Kicked me out of the house to go play," Jaden shouted as he picked himself off the ground. "What's your name?"

"Mai. What is a sweet young thing like you hanging around the Kaiba mansion?"

"Oh, I am just staying here for the nippl-summer, summer! S-so what are you doing here?"

"Here to see the man, but seems like you would be funner to talk to." She leaned forward; allowing her breasts to touch the bars.

"So, do you like to play games?" Jaden said, as he put one hand on the bars to lean on.

"Yeah, well, depends." Mai breasts seemed to jiggle with every breath.

"Duel Monsters?" Jaden said trying to sound all cool.

"Among others." Mai flirted.

"You smell very pretty." Jaden's voice squeeked up a bit so he put his hand over his mouth. "Sorry."

"No need. I think it is incredibly cute when a man's voice squeaks up like that." She winked. "Would you like some perfume?"

"Yeah, sure..." Jaden girlishly bit his bottom lip. Mai took out more of the perfume she was already wearing. It was in a tiny glass spay bottle. Small enough to be comfortably kept in a pocket. On it, a little heart. She sprayed it in the open droplets fell like sprinkles all over little Jaden.

"So," Mai nervously looked around. "You wanna go for a ride?" She pointed over at her purple convertible.

Jaden was speechless but he quickly hopped over the tall fence. "Wait... I gotta go tell..." Mai's face suddenly got really close. He could almost taste the mint on her breath, and then, he could. Her smooth tongue made him feel all light and giggly. But the good mood was ruined. A tall shadow loomed over them.

"Jaden," a stern voice from behind caused a fear to climb up into Jaden's throat. He felt as if he was a puppy being scruffed for bad behavior. But then, something took over him.

"I'm in love!" Jaden shouted. "I love her and you can't stop me from being with her!" Jaden spread his arms straight out to guard Mai from any potential harm.

"No you don't!" Kaiba scooped Jaden up into his arms and waved Mai goodbye with the other.

"Let. Me. Go!" Jaden yelled, hitting Kaiba's back to accentuate his anger. Roland opened the door for Kaiba.

"Thank you for telling me that harpy was out there."

He simply bowed his head and went to the kitchen. Kaiba and Roland had this silent communication thing down. They could probably have a whole conversation with just their eyes and an occasional small grunt from Kaiba.

Kaiba dropped Jaden on the couch. Immediately Jaden tried to run out the door. Kaiba grabbed him by the shoulders. "Listen to me! You are not in love. You just got whacked with pheromones." Kaiba paused. He could smell perfume coming off of Jaden. He turned his face away and tried not to breathe so much. His heart started to race and he tried to ignore other signs of attraction. "I will figure this out in my basement, okay?" Kaiba looked at Jaden to make sure he understood. He didn't.

Jaden's eyes looked to kill. Eyebrows furrowed. "I'll do anything to be with her. You can't stop me."

Just as if Roland knew that Kaiba needed him, Roland showed up. "I need you to take Jaden to his room and stay with him while I work on a cure or this wears off."

Truth is, Kaiba had been hit with this stuff before. He has the cure somewhere written in his notes or stored away; it had just been so long since the last time...


	5. Chapter 5

All was quiet when Kaiba was searching for the antidote to Madam Butterfly's love drug when...

_~Ring Ring.~_

"What is it?" Kaiba said, shifting through tons of detailed notes of days gone by. _Why aren't these filed like everything else in my life?_

"Kaiba sir, Jaden has fallen asleep. May I assist you?" Roland said in a hopeful tone.

"How long has he been asleep?" Kaiba flitted through a few more pages of his notes.

Roland looked at his watch to be sure, "For the past hour, sir."

Kaiba looked hopelessly at his notes before saying, "You may help me then."

As Roland walked out, Jaden peaked one eye open. He had been pretending to sleep as Mai's sweet figure danced with him in his head. Even if he didn't know what fiance meant, he knew he wanted to be with her the rest of his life, no matter what. His ears strained to hear Roland walking all the way down the stairs. He waited a few moments before throwing off the comforter and slipping on his Slifer Red sneakers.

_Hm. If they look in here they are going to know instantly that I am gone. _He then looked towards the closet. There were extra pillows in there. He pulled out the pillows and shoved them under the comforter to make it appear that he is still under the covers. He took a Kuriboh stuffed animal and put it so it looked like his hair poking out from under the comforter. Least from far away.

Then, he went to the window, he looked back to see if anyone was going to make a disturbance at the door. Jaden decided it was safe to put his right foot over the cill and hop the rest of the way out on to a tree growing freakishly close to the Kaiba home. Climbing down was difficult but Jaden managed to get close enough to the ground to jump off without getting hurt. He looked around again, and do to faulty security, Jaden was able to hop the fence without being detected.

While Jaden was making a run for it, Roland found the notes that Kaiba was looking for. "Found them for you sir."

Kaiba grabbed the book from Roland and found he was right. _The Cure All Pill. Why couldn't I remember that? _Kaiba sat there for a few moments confused, wondering if he has been getting enough sleep lately, or if he was getting old. After all, Kaiba was in his mid-twenties by now. All of his greatest achievements though, still in use, seemed farther behind him. Then he looked at Roland. _Now, t__hat fucker is old._ And suddenly that made everything better._ But he found my notes, dammit. _Kaiba broke a pencil in half with one hand.

"Are you ok, sir?" Roland put one hand on Kaiba's back and began trying to soothe him with gentle rubbing.

"_Yes, perfectly content. _Go fetch Jaden." Kaiba stared off continuing to wonder if being in your mid 20's was old. _Maybe I should consider retiring..._Kaiba slowly started to drift off into his thoughts.

All of a sudden, Roland burst threw the door. He was panting and nervous sweat was dripping down his forehead. "Kaiba! Jaden was only pretending to be asleep!"

"What!" Kaiba roared. Kaiba paused to get a hold of his emotions. "I knew I should have made you stay with him," Kaiba muttered to himself.

"I know sir. It is all my fault. I should have stayed." Roland looked down as gravity seemed to be pulling his head closer to the ground. Roland had the look of pure devastation to have failed his master.

Kaiba put a hand on his shoulder. "Don't worry. You have made few mistakes and in the end, you have always been there for me."

Unanticipatedly, Kaiba was given a tight hug. Roland had happy tears streaming down his face. "Thank you sir. Thank you." Roland started to nuzzle into Kaiba's shoulder. Kaiba was tense with discomfort.

"Roland, I get that you are elated to not be dismissed from responsibility but it is imperative t-that we both remain equanimous during this time." Kaiba said gently pushing him off.

Roland straitened out quick after and coughed into his hand before saying, "Uh, sorry sir. Won't happen again."

"Better not." Suddenly Kaiba realized something._ Shit. _He looked over at Roland's expression. Kaiba knew instantly, that he was being sized up and checked out like a hunk of meat. "Roland, I know we have known each other for a long time but, you do not love me. I just got some of Jaden's, Madam Butterfly's perfume on me." Kaiba stuttered over his words. _Jaden..._

"I know sir, I am trying to resist. But, I love you; I always have." Roland sniffed.

"Fuck..." Kaiba said under his breath. Kaiba thought for a few seconds before attempting to pump himself up to save Jaden. "Time to suit up!"

Quickly 'suiting up' Kaiba became Kaibaman and went off to rescue Jaden from the seductress known as Madam Butterfly.

Will Kaiba be able to save Jaden and defeat Madam Butterfly? We will find out next time: Same Kaiba Time, Same Kaiba Channel! :D


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Ok. As anyone who has been reading this should know by now~ There is some major Mai x Jaden things going on. If you are uncomfortable with that, you probably should stop reading this story. Cause this is where I am making it rated M on the basis that Mai is like 32 (?) and Jaden is only 16, literally half her age. There are some other things that happen in this chapter that you may be uncomfortable with. Just be prepared for it. **

_When last we left our brave heros Jaden was sprayed with pheramon perfume and had fallen in love with Madam Butterfly. Kaibaman smelt the perfume on Jaden and he is trying to resist his feelings for Jaden. Kaibaman got some of the perfume on him and to everyone's surprise, Roland was in love with Kaibaman. Now everyone's in love, love, love. Stay glued to your seat! The worst is yet to come!_

Madam Butterfly sat gracefully on her thrown, stroking her riding crop, looking pleased with herself. She let the riding crop trail her own cheek then bit it sensually. Her loyal moths were dancing around her. Madam Butterfly jumped out of her thrown when she heard a disturbance at the door. "Hm, here already?" Madam Butterfly was impressed. She pointed at the door, "Moths, let the boy in!"

A Mothman skipped flamboyantly to the door and opened it. Jaden was soaking wet. "Tsk, tsk, tsk, sweetheart. What happened? You fall into the rotten man's moat?"

"I fell into his koi pond. But Mai- Madam Butterfly, my love, I won't dare leave your side again. I love you too much for that," Jaden went to hug Mai but she stepped away. "What? Oh, I'm sorry. I...I'm all wet-"

"That makes two of us." Madam Butterfly smiled devilishly.

Jaden flushed. "S-so should I...I-"

"Sure, sweet thing. Show me the goods."

Jaden blushed and took off his jacket first. Then he reached back and pulled his sopping wet shirt over his head and dropped it on the ground. Stop, she mouthed. Madam Butterfly walked by, dragging her crop against his chest. "Moths? Go get Jaden here some pants." When she had walked full-circle around Jaden she put her crop up to his chin. "You are a pretty face now, aren't you?" She looked off to see if her Mothmen had brought her new pet a nice dry pair of pants. "You know what sickens me though?"

"W-What?" Jaden was scared that Mai may say that she doesn't love him.

She turned and leaned down a tad, placing one hand on his cheek. "You know how soulful your eyes are?"

"I'll gouge them out for you!" Jaden quickly put his hands over his eyes.

"No! No... sweety, not what I'm talking about." She tapped his cheek and started to pace, "I love your eyes." Jaden let out a big sigh of relief. "A little too much, perhaps. You see, a long time ago, a man by the name of Seto Kaiba broke my heart not once, not twice, but three times."

"I want to be the only one you love!" Jaden yelled out. "Please love me most..." Jaden looked down as if he was about to cry.

"Darling I do. I do. I am just telling you why you're here. Why I love you so much." Madam Butterfly put her hands over her heart. Jaden looked reassured and Madam Butterfly continued. "The first was ten years ago, we were dating. I was testing his games and he was buying me wonderful cars, motorcycles, clothes, fabulous perfume, whatever I desired. This was true love you see. But then, something happened." Madam Butterfly took a moment for herself and to make the revelation seem more dramatic. "Joey Wheeler. I loved him too, but in a different way. There was no way that boy could satisfy me, least on his salary he was making working for the local paper. But, Kaiba saw Joey had love in his heart for me and broke mine. So, I went out with Joey like he said I should. And just when I was feeling hot and heavy over him..." a tear fell out from under her mask. "But wouldn't you know? Seto Kaiba loved him too. The greedy man stole him from me. Just like that. And the last... the last time... Kaiba... he killed my Joey."

Madam Butterfly turned to see Kaibaman standing at the door; applauding Madam Butterfly's Oscar winning performance. "Too bad. If I wasn't me, I would believe you." Out of all corners of the room, Mothmen appeared, ready to fight. Jaden looked angry, ready to defend his woman.

"How dare you say something so cruel to her? All she did was love and you just return it with bitter hate!" Jaden spat.

"Gift of the silver tongue. The mark of a true woman." Kaibaman said. "Jaden, the sooner you close your ears to this demon, the sooner you can arrive at the reality of things. Her tale is nothing but fantasy, I did none of it."

"Yes you did! She would never lie about something like that. You murderer!"

Kaibaman took a step back. _That isn't true... that isn't true... it wasn't my fault._ Mothmen from all directions tackled Kaibaman when his defenses were down and wrestled him to the ground.

Madam Butterfly walked up to Kaibaman who was being held down by the Mothmen. She knelt down and with her riding crop lifted his chin, "Dear, let this be a lesson. To try to interfere with true love is a fool's errand." She got up and looked to her Mothmen. They nodded.

She pushed Jaden down and threw down a lit smoke bomb; fleeing the scene with her henchmen. The room was filling up with the perfume. When the smoke cleared, Jaden was making eyes at Kaibaman. He crawled over to him, his body trembling and half naked. Kaibaman sat up. Slowly Jaden reached up and removed the helmet. Kaiba's blue gazed at Jaden, not knowing what he was going to do next. Jaden leaned forward a little... Kaiba nervously swallowed. Jaden closed his eyes and slightly parted his lips. Kaiba's heart raced. In an instant everything went quiet. Kaiba's lips were touching Jaden's. Kaiba put on hand on Jaden's face. Kaiba and Jaden lost themselves in each other for a few moments.

Jaden pulled away. "Dude, why did you shove this pill in my mouth with your tongue?" Jaden pulled the pill out of his mouth and made a yuck face. "And bro? You... kissed me!" Jaden spat on the ground to try to get it out. "Christ man, you have...you have problems! My mouth was open you...you faggot! God!"

Kaiba laughed. "I had to! If I didn't conceal the pill in my mouth she would have found it for sure!"

"I don't recall her being in the room when you kissed me you could have taken it out of your mouth you sick fuck!" Jaden licked his hand.

"You kissed me," Kaiba shrugged. "Gotta do what you gotta do in this line of work." Kaiba got up and grabbed his helmet. Kaiba groaned. "Crap, the hair is all tangled." Kaiba put the helmet on anyway.

Jaden looked around. "Now what?"

"We go home." Kaiba pointed towards the door and placed a guiding hand on Jaden's back and walked out of Madam Butterfly's lair.

Unfortunately, Madam Butterfly had left behind a final middle finger for the dynamic duo...or more accurate would be to say it was what she hadn't left behind...

"Dude, where's your car?" Jaden asked.


	7. Chapter 7

The wind blew through their hair as they stood in silence. The cold bit at Jaden's fingers.

Jaden leaned back and looked behind Kaibaman. His eyes were drawn to a tangle in his long hair. He wanted to bust up laughingy... yet knew it wouldn't be appropriate, so he covered his mouth and let out some snickers instead. Kaibaman flashed Jaden a glare. The culprit bit his bottom lip trying to stifle his laughter further but it only caused it to escalate to full blown laughter.

"Stop,"Kaibaman said firmly.

Jaden was on the sidewalk face beat red unable to stop laughing. "I-I c-cn't stuppfft!" Jaden tried to explain but he couldn't help but laugh at his own laughs.

Kaibaman withheld his rage. He briefly thought about kicking the boy in the gut. The kid surely would stop laughing with the wind knocked out of him. But instead, Kaibaman walked forth. "Come on, Jaden. We need to get to the police station."

Jaden took a deep breath. He looked up at the sky for a moment before he got off the cold pavement and ran to catch up with Kaibaman.

A few blocks down the sidewalk they came across the large white police station, a professional and symmetrical sort of building, short and squat. Kaibaman took off his helmet, "I need to report my car stolen. You stay here."

"Hey," Jaden put his hands on his hips. "Are we gonna be a team, or are going to keep pushing this lone ranger junk? Gimme a break. I'm going in with you."

Kaibaman scoffed and went inside, Jaden in tow.

The florescent lights were harsh on the eyes after a night of fighting or rather getting beaten up and chewed on by crime. Kaiba quickly strolled up to the counter, where a single middle-aged cop sat reading a magazine.

"I have a stolen vehicle report to make." Seto cleared his throat.

He looked up from his magazine for a second, then sat forward in his chair. "Something wrong with your other sixty-eight cars, Mister Kaiba?"

"It's seventy-two now. And this one's special." Kaiba replied deftly.

"I see," the officer picked through a couple folders spread out in front of him, finally pulling a red sheet from one of them and handing it to the Kaibacorp CEO. "We'll be on it immediately."

"That what you tell everyone?" Kaiba took the sheet and grabbed the pen-on-chain from the counter.

"Actually, no," the officer shrugged. "But let's be realistic here, your annual donations pay for my apartment and my car."

"Don't forget the gun." Kaiba began to quickly fill out the form with the important information.

"Actually, no. The gun's mine. The bullets would be you though." the officer smiled. He then pulled the cell phone from his vest pocket. "Could you do my voice message? The guys would get a kick out of it."

Kaiba narrowed his eyes, "When you do your job and find my car, maybe then we can talk."

"Of course."

He handed the paper to the officer and turned to leave. Jaden was hugging and elderly woman had been conversing with.

"Come on, Jaden."

Jaden jumped out of his chair and waved goodbye to the woman.

"Kaiba, I think she needs our-"

"Wait! Kaiba!" The officer yelled waving his keys about. "Let me give you a ride home! Besides, after reading your report I realized that she, Madam Butterfly might be at your home."

Kaiba looked over his shoulder. He sighed "Fine..." Kaiba didn't want to have to walk all the way home anyway.

The officer pulled up to the front of the Kaiba mansion. "Thanks."

"Oh no thank you !" the officer said.

Kaiba gave a nod to the officer to acknowledge that he accepted his thanks. Eager to get inside, Kaiba ran and hopped his own fence. Jaden followed suit to an impressive standard. Kaiba looked at him baffled.

"Come on old man!" Jaden yelled as he ran passed Kaiba.

Kaibaman and Kuriboh burst onto the scene. Inside they find Madam Butterfly ransacking the place. She was bent over. Her ass being squeezed in her skin tight suit. She rose sexily making sure her entire body oozed her hotness. Her legs set perfect to show off her ass as she flipped her hair back. "I see the dynamic dimwits have come to ruin my fun." Her boobs jiggled every time she took a breath.

"Madam, I am going to have to ask you to leave my house." Kaibaman said.

She let out a soft groan, "Oh honey. Tsk tsk. My how you have curdled with age." She walked passed Kaibaman, dragging her fingers across his suit. She got behind him and pressed herself against him.

"He's only what? 30? You are older than him old broad!" Jaden foolishly spat at Madam Butterfly.

Kaibaman hit his own face. "I am only 26, Jaden..."

"Oops. Damn you look older!"

Kaiba growled.

Madam Butterfly rubbed her hands across his face. "Wrinkles already...how sad. Too much work and no play that is what it does."

Madam Butterfly wrapped her arm around Kaibaman's throat and pulled him back into a choke hold. Kaibaman tried to elbow her but was helpless. Mothmen came out from all directions to prevent Jaden from saving his partner!

Looks like the dynamic duo is in trouble! Just what have they gotten their proboscis into this time? Will the officer hear their cries coming from their palps? Or will it be as soft as a whisper? Will they get the necessary tailwind to defeat the evil Madam Butterfly and her Mothmen? Find out next time! Same Kaiba time! Same Kaiba fic!

**A/N: Don't worry. I haven't given up on this fic just yet. Almost done. LOL. I just get stuck sometimes. **


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